Life isn’t always sunshine and roses, even when it comes to romance but part of true love is being there and supporting each other. Even in the darkest of hours when life can simply be ugly, gritty and brutal. A late night phone call finds Victoria and Philip on a mad dash to come to the aid of their friends, who for no reason other than the fact they are being themselves are brutally attacked on their way home after an evening performance at the club. A tense night in the Emergency room of a city hospital sets the stage for this dramatic tale to be played out.
ACT TWENTY TWO
Even with the briefest of glances that I stole of Victoria, as I pulled out into the street, it told me so much about the maelstrom of emotions surging through her. She was pure compressed energy and valiantly straining to keep herself in control. Perhaps it was the artist in me or just the bond we shared that allowed me to see and feel so much of her emotion and pain. It was etched deeply on her face and far into the depths of her eyes. Her body was tensed, poised like a jaguar ready to pounce as she leaned forward in her seat as if perched upon a limb waiting, coiled ready to spring. Her face, though was wan, with the unnaturally pale pallor of one that is gravely concerned for the wellbeing of someone that they love, her eyes told yet another story. There was a fire burning intensely in them, an outraged anger in them that telegraphed the fact if she ever got her hands on whoever had perpetrated this atrocity upon her beloved friend there would be hell to pay. Her hands were clenched into fists, so tightly that her knuckles were white.
“Philip take a right at the next set of lights.” It was the first time she had spoken since we’d gotten into the car and had sped off into the night. Her tone was tight with a practiced control and it bespoke of a person that had gone through this scenario before. I realized despite the fact she was outwardly in warrior princess mode ready to do whatever she could for her beloved friend Sush, there was also the shock, disbelief and anger that such a thing could happen. There were no tears, but I felt certain that they would come at some point and time as means of washing away the intense abject pain she was feeling now. When they did come I was going to be by her side and would be the one to offer her a safe harbour in my arms to comfort and console her in the best way that I could.
Removing one hand from the steering wheel I placed it on top of hers and gave it a gentle squeeze of reassurance. Her response was to squeeze me back but in a vice like grip that told me how deeply she was hurting inside and how much she needed me there with her. She continued to direct me through the darkened streets of the city, lit only by street lights and the flashing neon signs of pizza parlours and coffee shops that were open all night. Office buildings were dark with only the odd window lit making it appear as if they had been battered, with only gaping spaces between the teeth of light. The moon was overshadowed by clouds seemingly in keeping with the cloud that was currently over shadowing the heart and mind of my Victoria. It matched my own glum frame of mind and I too was numb, from shock over this recent turn of events. As much as it pained me to see Victoria in distress this way, it troubled me even more that something like this had occurred. What had the people that had attacked our friends hoped to accomplish by beating them? Was it some sort of warped religious vigilante justice to keep the world pure and cleansed in their eyes? ‘Why can’t people just learn tolerance of others?’ my mind argued helplessly. Cowards is what they were, overpowering people by sheer numbers and then attacking like a pack of rabid animals.
Savage bastards, how I’d like to get my own hands on them and show them the meaning of pain, but then I’d be no better than they were at the end of the day. Solving this with my fists was not the answer and I knew it but right now I could easily go a few rounds in the gym with a punching bag to take out my anger and aggression on. At least it would ensure in that no one else would be harmed but that I could blow off some the indignant rage that was coursing through me. I was outraged by what had happened to someone who in such a short time I had come to consider a cherished, much respected, as well as a beloved friend. I was going to find a way to make some sense of all this but I also realized it was going to take some time. Right now my focus was on Victoria and helping our friends in any manner that I could. The worst part was this utter feeling of helplessness. My love for her was boundless and yet i was powerless to really help. Other than being beside her for moral support it was incredible frustrating not being able to do much more than hold her hand.
Other than Victoria, continuing to give me directions until we pulled into a public parking lot adjacent to the hospital neither of us had said anything else. Both scrambling to focus our thoughts and centre ourselves so we could be there for our friends and be fully present for them. After I parked I quickly found the parking attendant in his small booth. He was busily scanning a well-worn, dog eared copy of some paperback that had seen better days. He looked up startled by my sudden presence. It was probably old hat to him having harried looking people arriving on the run, anxious to bolt across the street to check on the progress of their loved ones. “The flat rate of twenty bucks is probably your best bet” He said not mincing any words. I plucked my wallet out of my back pocket and fished a twenty out of it, and slid it through the slot in the glassed in window.
He printed out a card, slipped it though the opening. “Just make sure you leave in on the window of the car where it’s visible and good luck to you.” He said giving me a quick thumbs up and returning to his book. Rushing back to the car I tossed the proof of payment on to the dashboard where it would easily be visible and locked the doors. Grabbing Victoria by the hand firmly we began to dash towards the hospital. We paused only momentarily to check to any oncoming traffic and dashed across the street. Not familiar with exactly where the emergency entrance was, I paced my stride so that Victoria could lead the way. We flew down a small side street to the back of the hospital and around the corner to the brightly lit emergency entrance. The automatic doors sliding open at our approach, we rushed through them scanning the room as we entered.
There was Kandy Kane, slumped dejectedly in one of those horrible plastic chairs that are bolted to the floor. Her face was a portrait of defeat. Makeup smudged by tears, dishevelled clothes torn and soiled with a combination of dirt and blood from the assault. Her right eye surrounded by an ugly flowering mass in hues of blacks, blues, and purples that were tinged with slashes of dried brownish red blood. Her lip was swollen grotesquely, which she stroking gingerly with one hand. Dried blood and mucus trailed from her nose. It was a forlorn site to say the least. Fear and pain racked her eyes, shivering and jumping nervously with each noise around her as if waiting for the next blow to fall on her. Clearly traumatized she reminded me of an animal that had been severely abused and cowered, whimpering, fearful of the unknown. The squeak of our sneakers on the hospital floor caused her to jerk her head up, her eyes filled with fear. A glimmer of hope crept in her eyes at the sight of the two of us. We were here in the hopes we could provide comfort and be a fortress she could seek refuge in, to help ease her many hurts, both physical and emotional.
I could tell Victoria wanted to embrace her friend but was mindful that it might cause her to become even more skittish under the circumstances. Victoria knelt on the floor in front of her friend and took her hand in hers, as I hovered behind her ready to do anything that was needed. Her voice was soft and comforting. “We’re here now and we’ll get through this together. Have you been seen by a doctor yet?” she questioned softly. Kandy snuffled back some tears, which had come to leak down her cheeks at our arrival. “Yes” she barely managed to get the word out. Victoria patiently waited while her friend collected herself enough to speak. She gently rubbed Kandy’s hand in hers, silently encouraging her to continue when she could. “The triage nurse took a look at me, I’ll be okay. I’m not a priority patient with my injuries but…Sush, Sush…oh my God, Vic, she’s not even conscious. They wouldn’t let me in the room with her because i wasn't a spouse or family! Like i just don't count for anything. Oh Vic this is my fault if we’d taken a cab home none of this would have happened but it was a nice night and we she suggested we walk,” she began to hiccup between words as they caught in her throat. “And I … and I thought it was a good idea.” Her voice faltered as she spoke. “It’s not your fault at all.” Victoria reassured her calmly. “You two didn’t do anything wrong and you have to believe that.”
The tears rolled freely now down Kandy’s face, and she sputtered as long gasps of air escaped her lungs. “You’re going to start hyperventilating, deep breaths. You’re okay, your safe now. Philip and I are here for you.” Victoria calmly but doggedly kept repeating phrases of positive reassurance to her friend, and it dawned on me she was doing as much for her own sake as for Kandy’s. I knelt beside her on the floor and placed my large hand gently over both hers and the one that she held. Kandy raised her head, ever so slightly as I did so. “We’re in this together. That’s what real friends do for each other.” I told her offering my own reassurances. The faintest look of hope sprouted on her face. “Thank you.” Was all she said but it somehow seemed to sum it up and I somehow knew the depths of her gratitude. “Look I don’t mean to be out of place here but have the police been contacted about this yet?” I prodded her as kindly as I could under the circumstances. I knew everything she’d been through had been traumatizing and that she was still in a great deal of physical pain as well, but it was better to report this to the authorities sooner rather than later. “Yes. It was a couple of passerby’s that saw what was happening and came to our aid. They phoned 911 so the police were there along with the ambulance. An officer took my statement and said he’d back to talk to me again and to check and see if Sush regained consciousness.” Which sent her into a fresh torrent of tears. I looked at Victoria questioningly, only to see her gallantly trying to fight back her own tears with a swipe of the back of her hand against her eyes.
“Randy, Randy Pearson” a female voice called. An ER nurse in scrubs stood holding a clipboard. “Over here.” I said as I rose to my full height. “Would you please follow me into exam room 7 please, sir?” she intoned. “Actually” I said, indicating the figure seated before me, “This would be Mr. Pearson. I’m just a close friend.” “Oh” she said, as her eyes darted to her chart and she flipped a couple of pages, as her eyes furtively scanned it. “Would it be all right if Miss Bellamy and I accompanied our friend, for moral support?” I asked. “Of course, it would as long as Mr. Pearson doesn’t have any objections to that.” She responded as she quickly recovered from her initial surprise. “No, I don’t.” Kandy responded listlessly. Victoria rose to her feet and the two of us gently helped Kandy up from her seat and escorted her on either side, forming a protective shield around Kandy as we began the slow walk to the exam room. She was stiff and moved slowly, almost mechanically with jerky movements. Victoria and I each had her by one arm in case she faltered in any way.
In the exam room we helped her on to the exam table and even with our help it was still a major exertion for her after all that she’d been through. The nurse began to go through the routine of following up on the questions the admitting triage nurse had asked her earlier, as well as applying a blood pressure cuff and monitoring a few other things and making notations on her patients chart. When she was through she flipped the chart closed and informed us that the Doctor would be in shortly after reviewing the chart. Before she could depart we made an inquiry about Sush and if there had been any changes in her condition. “I’m sorry” she responded. “I don’t know, but I’ll find out for you and get back to you as soon as possible.” We thanked her and she departed silently other than the slight squeak of the soles of her shoes as turned to exit.
“God how I hate, hospitals.” I thought to myself. It wasn’t so much the place itself that I hated but rather what it had come to represent to me. Cold, sterile, filled with a brooding ominous air and I’d come to loathe it. I’d spent too many nights over the years, all too similar to this one, and it killed a part of me each time I was caught up in it. It gnawed at me with its sharp little fangs, trying to inject it’s venom into me and poison my faith in humanity. Still I clung to that faith that there was still good in this world of ours, a world where there was still decency and kindness. There was a shining example of that decency and compassion that I still believed in, present in this room in the form of Philip. Here stood a man who less than a month ago, would never have found himself in this position and now he was hovering, as if he were a guardian angel, willing to do anything he could to offer comfort and support. In my eyes Philip, had shown such depth and strength of character and I couldn’t help but love him just a little more because of it.
There was also a silent undercurrent of rage, seething inside of me, about the senseless act of brutality that had been perpetrated on my friends. What had these people hoped to prove by doing this? I have to admit I was having some less than choice thoughts about what I’d like to do the cowardly creeps that had done this. Yes I wanted justice and no it wasn’t the eye for an eye kind that, was oh so tempting to consider. I was actually ashamed of myself for some of the vicious thoughts that were running through my mind because if I acted upon any of them I’d be no better than the pathetic people who had done this to my friends. Sush and Kandy and been minding their own business, they hadn’t done a single thing wrong. Yet were attacked just because they were different. Where did madness like this end? Where did people draw the line and decide to cross it and attack someone simply because they were being themselves? The more I thought about it the more it was doing my head in, and my head began to throb.“I can’t thank you two enough for being here. I was just so lost…” Kandy’s voice said breaking the silence of the room. “Think nothing of it.” Philip interjected. “Friends are there to support each other in good times and in bad.” “Totally.” I replied backing him up a hundred percent. Kandy sniffed back some tears of gratitude. “You two are the best. I hope you know that.” She said sincerely.
The doctor arrived at this juncture in the conversation. “Good evening. I’m Dr. Daniels.” He said introducing himself. He had a chart in his hands that he took another quick scan of, looking a bit befuddled at seeing a female patient on the exam table while he clearly had the charts for a male patient. “I’m a drag queen Doc.” Kandy supplied trying to avoid any further awkwardness. “Well then clearly I do have the correct charts. Now would you prefer that I refer to you as Randy or as something else? Randy or Kandy is fine, but I appreciate you asking.” Kandy clarified. “Right then, let me give you a good going over to see what we’re dealing with here. Would you like your friends to stay or step out into the hall while I do this?” The doctor asked and I was thankful that we’d gotten one with such a compassionate bedside manner. “I’m good either way.” She responded. “Victoria why don’t you stay and I’ll go see if I can track down that nurse or check at the front desk and see if I can find out about Sush?” Philip enquired kindly. It was as if he could read my mind. He knew I was torn between the desire not to abandon Kandy when she was still so unsettled and the desire to try and get details about how Sush was currently fairing. “Thank you.” Was all I said as he took my hand gave it a squeeze and said. “I’ll be back as soon as I can, hopefully with some good news.” And with that he hurried out of the room.
Dr. Daniels was thorough and kind in his examination being as gentle and respectful as was humanly possible. Thankfully there were no broken bones, but there were a couple of bruised ribs, that were sure to be tender for some time to come. He had cleaned and dressed her wounds with the help of a nurse who had returned to assist him. Fortunately no stitches were required. The bruises were deepening in colour and she still looked rough to say the least, but some of the colour had started to flood back into her face and I took that as a good sign. “Fortunately there doesn’t seem to be any signs of a concussion. I can release you tonight, provided you have someone to stay with you and keep an eye on you for any complications. If not I’ll admit you.” “She’ll be coming home with me Dr. Daniels. Just let me know what to keep an eye out for.” I responded quickly before Kandy could protest. “I’ll give you a follow up care list and if you notice anything on this list, please don’t hesitate to come back immediately. I’m also writing out a script for some painkillers which will have the added benefit of helping her relax and get some much needed rest.
There’s a pharmacy over on at Yonge and …” he began. “Carlton that’s open 24 hours where I can get it filled tonight. Sorry, but I’ve been down this road before.” I informed him. “Well I can see you’ll be in capable hands. I understand you have another friend that’s here as well, so please take your time and feel free to wait in here if you wish while you find out what’s going on with her. Kandy, I’ll send a nurse in with a first dose of meds for you to help you relax and relieve some of your pain. Lie down and rest if you can. Take your time, there’s no need to rush and I’m sure you want to be find out what’s going on with your other friend.” He said kindly. “Oh and I hope this isn’t out of line or inappropriate for me to say, but I’m relatively new here at St. Michael’s. I transferred here from a small hospital up in northern Quebec and this has been my first experience with a patient…such as yourself.” He added fumbling on the words “I’d just like to say that it’s been a privilege to have been of service to you. You’re obviously good people, despite sharing a life style that’s rather foreign to me.” He concluded. “Thank you Dr. Daniels.” Both Kandy and I said and truly meant it.
We were both thankful that we’d had been blessed with a compassionate, understanding doctor who took the rather unusual circumstances of his patient all into stride. He’d treated Kandy with dignity which was so important after the ordeal she had just experienced. I helped her lie down on the exam table and tried to make her as comfortable as I could. Kandy shivered despite the blankets that I covered her with and tucked in around her. This larger than life person, now seemed so tiny and fragile to me. As I gently stroked a few strands of hair off of her face, I could see the tension still so evident in her features. Placing my hand on her shoulder softly I hoped it would offer her some form of security. Knowing she was probably too fearful to shut her eyes, even for a few moments for fear the terrifying images of what had happened would flood her mind becoming an instant replay of the horrors she’d faced in the form of a nightmare. We spoke little, she remained in a prone positon only rallying to lift her head long enough to swallow the pain pills that a nurse brought in for her. The water that she’d the swallowed the medication with ran in a little stream over her swollen lip, and I gently dabbed it dry with a tissue. Like a mother hovering over the bed of sick child, waiting for any sign of improvement. Finally her eyes closed and she drifted off into sleep.
Ensuring she was in fact asleep I tippy toed across the room and into the brightly lit hallway, to see if there was any sign of Philip and if he’d been able to find out any information about Sush. Keeping my ears alert for any sign of distress from Kandy, my eyes searched the corridor. The hallway was packed as it tended to be on a Saturday night in a city hospital. People pushed rapidly down corridors on their way to be x rayed or have emergency surgeries performed. A sea of anxious faces of varying ages, mothers clutching children who howled into their shoulders. Doctors, nurses and orderlies rushing here and there talking rapidly as they went. I stood in the shadows of the doorway taking it all in.It was with great relief that I finally saw Philip push through a set of swinging doors and make his way down the hallway towards me. “We’re you able to find anything out? Did they let you see her?” I rattled off a rapid succession of questions at him. I’m sure I sounded beyond frantic to him and I wasn’t even sure about half the questions I was asking and logically knew he couldn’t answer as fast as I was firing them off at him. Bless him though he was remarkably taking it all into stride as he took my hands in his.
“Yes, I’ve got some information for you and yes I was able to see her for a few minutes I had to fudge a little though, its relatives only so I told them I was Sush’s brother.” He told me. My entire body was on pins and needles and I felt the urge to scream at the top of my lungs, waiting for him to tell me what he’d found out. Then it hit me. “Her brother??????” I questioned totally befuddled. “Well it’s supposed to be family only, so it was the first thing I could of. When the nurse in charge gave me a skeptical look. “ I just told her, you’ve never heard of adoption? So whether she actually bought it or she was just being incredibly compassionate under the circumstances, I got the information and was able to see her.” He concluded. “The good news is she’s conscious, the bad news is she’s even more banged up than Kandy was. She’s pretty bruised and sore and there was some internal bleeding as well. She needed several stitches and she’s going to have to remain in the hospital for several days so they can keep a close eye on her and monitor. They’re also going to run several more tests to make sure that nothing has been overlooked. Looks like she’s going to be fine Victoria.” He added with relief evident in his voice. Bursting into tears I began to collapse into his arms then I started to laugh hysterically in between the sobs, as it finally struck me. Philip had truly embraced my friends to the point he too would go to any lengths for them. I was an emotional mess but Philip just held me, loving me and supporting me through all of it.
Grabbing her before she could sink to the floor I held her close to my chest. The tears I’d been expecting from her arrived in a torrent. Holding her pressed against my chest I just let her sob, I knew she needed the release it would provide. I just held her close and stroked her hair comforting her silently. The truth of the matter was that I was just as overwhelmed by all of this as she was and felt a little weak kneed myself. When her tears finally subsided and her sobs were nothing more than soft little hiccups of air, I lifted her face to mine. “Would you like to go see her and reassure yourself that she’s going to be okay?” I asked her softly. “Yes” she said softly but almost inaudibly “but I can’t leave…” she began. “Kandy alone in case she wakes up and becomes disorientated or fearful.” “It’ll be okay. I’ll stay with her and you go give yourself some peace of mind. It’s late and they won’t let you stay long as they want to get her settled for the night and get some rest. In fact she may already be asleep but even sneaking a peak at her is what you need most right now. Go on I’ll give you the directions to the room she’s in.” Giving her the directions to Sush’s room I gave her a light kiss on the forehead and a final hug before she left on her mission.
All of this had been exhausting and I was more than a little wiped out myself. I pulled on of the two plastic chairs that were against the one wall of the room and dragged it over to where Kandy lay resting. Settling in and stretching out as best I could I closed my own eyes as I gathered my own thoughts about everything that had happened in such a rapid fire sequence of events this evening. The grand opening of my latest business venture has gone off better than I could have ever imagined. I’d felt like the golden boy that could do no wrong after I’d been handed that plum offer to present my works in an exhibition at the Art Gallery of Ontario. Victoria had been in her element and shone brightly with her performances. Then a short but wonderful time spent with friends celebrating all the success we’d both just had. Finally taking my best girl home, looking forward to relaxing with her and falling asleep with her in my arms after a strenuous period of preparations on both out parts to make everything come off like the well-oiled machine functioning at peak capacity, just as it had.
But a ringing phone in the wee hours of the morning had changed all of that wonderful positive energy we had going on. That phone call had brought with it fear, uncertainly, anger, pain and a level of anxiety that I’d never experienced anything quite like before and hoped and prayed I’d never have to experience again. Knowing that Victoria had experienced all of this on other occasions sickened me no end and I felt the lump of unease in the pit of my stomach. It grieved me no end that I hadn’t been here to help her and comfort her during those times. My protective instincts towards her were finely honed despite the fact we had only been a couple a short while. It didn’t matter to me she was a part of me and I felt in the core of my being that she had always been a part of me. Even before I had known of her existence. Kandy stirred and a groan emitted from her. “Where am I? What happened?” she mumbled. Pushing the chair I stood up and took her hand. “Kandy it’s okay. You’re safe.” I assured her.
As her eyes opened, it took her a minute to collect her thoughts as her as she was still groggy from the medication they’d given her. “Philip? Where’s Victoria? How’s Sush?” she questioned as she tried to sit up. “No please don’t just relax as much as much as you can.” And she settled down again. Her eyes closed again as if the light in the room though dimmed was painful to her. “First of all how are you feeling now?” I asked her quietly. “Like I got run over by a transport truck.” She said wryly. “I’m tough I can take it. Now please tell me about the others.” She begged me. “While you were sleeping I was able to actually see Sush, she’s conscious now, she’s pretty sore and they’re going to keep her for observation for a few days but the doctors assure me that she’ll make a full recovery.” I told her wanting to be truthful with her but at the same time not causing her further stress with a blow by blow account of the extent of Sush’s injuries. “Thank God, for that.” She said empathically. It was at this conjuncture in the conversation that Victoria appeared in the room. She came over and stood on the other side of Kandy and took her other hand. With a single look to me she communicated so much.
ACT TWENTY TWO
Even with the briefest of glances that I stole of Victoria, as I pulled out into the street, it told me so much about the maelstrom of emotions surging through her. She was pure compressed energy and valiantly straining to keep herself in control. Perhaps it was the artist in me or just the bond we shared that allowed me to see and feel so much of her emotion and pain. It was etched deeply on her face and far into the depths of her eyes. Her body was tensed, poised like a jaguar ready to pounce as she leaned forward in her seat as if perched upon a limb waiting, coiled ready to spring. Her face, though was wan, with the unnaturally pale pallor of one that is gravely concerned for the wellbeing of someone that they love, her eyes told yet another story. There was a fire burning intensely in them, an outraged anger in them that telegraphed the fact if she ever got her hands on whoever had perpetrated this atrocity upon her beloved friend there would be hell to pay. Her hands were clenched into fists, so tightly that her knuckles were white.
“Philip take a right at the next set of lights.” It was the first time she had spoken since we’d gotten into the car and had sped off into the night. Her tone was tight with a practiced control and it bespoke of a person that had gone through this scenario before. I realized despite the fact she was outwardly in warrior princess mode ready to do whatever she could for her beloved friend Sush, there was also the shock, disbelief and anger that such a thing could happen. There were no tears, but I felt certain that they would come at some point and time as means of washing away the intense abject pain she was feeling now. When they did come I was going to be by her side and would be the one to offer her a safe harbour in my arms to comfort and console her in the best way that I could.
Removing one hand from the steering wheel I placed it on top of hers and gave it a gentle squeeze of reassurance. Her response was to squeeze me back but in a vice like grip that told me how deeply she was hurting inside and how much she needed me there with her. She continued to direct me through the darkened streets of the city, lit only by street lights and the flashing neon signs of pizza parlours and coffee shops that were open all night. Office buildings were dark with only the odd window lit making it appear as if they had been battered, with only gaping spaces between the teeth of light. The moon was overshadowed by clouds seemingly in keeping with the cloud that was currently over shadowing the heart and mind of my Victoria. It matched my own glum frame of mind and I too was numb, from shock over this recent turn of events. As much as it pained me to see Victoria in distress this way, it troubled me even more that something like this had occurred. What had the people that had attacked our friends hoped to accomplish by beating them? Was it some sort of warped religious vigilante justice to keep the world pure and cleansed in their eyes? ‘Why can’t people just learn tolerance of others?’ my mind argued helplessly. Cowards is what they were, overpowering people by sheer numbers and then attacking like a pack of rabid animals.
Savage bastards, how I’d like to get my own hands on them and show them the meaning of pain, but then I’d be no better than they were at the end of the day. Solving this with my fists was not the answer and I knew it but right now I could easily go a few rounds in the gym with a punching bag to take out my anger and aggression on. At least it would ensure in that no one else would be harmed but that I could blow off some the indignant rage that was coursing through me. I was outraged by what had happened to someone who in such a short time I had come to consider a cherished, much respected, as well as a beloved friend. I was going to find a way to make some sense of all this but I also realized it was going to take some time. Right now my focus was on Victoria and helping our friends in any manner that I could. The worst part was this utter feeling of helplessness. My love for her was boundless and yet i was powerless to really help. Other than being beside her for moral support it was incredible frustrating not being able to do much more than hold her hand.
Other than Victoria, continuing to give me directions until we pulled into a public parking lot adjacent to the hospital neither of us had said anything else. Both scrambling to focus our thoughts and centre ourselves so we could be there for our friends and be fully present for them. After I parked I quickly found the parking attendant in his small booth. He was busily scanning a well-worn, dog eared copy of some paperback that had seen better days. He looked up startled by my sudden presence. It was probably old hat to him having harried looking people arriving on the run, anxious to bolt across the street to check on the progress of their loved ones. “The flat rate of twenty bucks is probably your best bet” He said not mincing any words. I plucked my wallet out of my back pocket and fished a twenty out of it, and slid it through the slot in the glassed in window.
He printed out a card, slipped it though the opening. “Just make sure you leave in on the window of the car where it’s visible and good luck to you.” He said giving me a quick thumbs up and returning to his book. Rushing back to the car I tossed the proof of payment on to the dashboard where it would easily be visible and locked the doors. Grabbing Victoria by the hand firmly we began to dash towards the hospital. We paused only momentarily to check to any oncoming traffic and dashed across the street. Not familiar with exactly where the emergency entrance was, I paced my stride so that Victoria could lead the way. We flew down a small side street to the back of the hospital and around the corner to the brightly lit emergency entrance. The automatic doors sliding open at our approach, we rushed through them scanning the room as we entered.
There was Kandy Kane, slumped dejectedly in one of those horrible plastic chairs that are bolted to the floor. Her face was a portrait of defeat. Makeup smudged by tears, dishevelled clothes torn and soiled with a combination of dirt and blood from the assault. Her right eye surrounded by an ugly flowering mass in hues of blacks, blues, and purples that were tinged with slashes of dried brownish red blood. Her lip was swollen grotesquely, which she stroking gingerly with one hand. Dried blood and mucus trailed from her nose. It was a forlorn site to say the least. Fear and pain racked her eyes, shivering and jumping nervously with each noise around her as if waiting for the next blow to fall on her. Clearly traumatized she reminded me of an animal that had been severely abused and cowered, whimpering, fearful of the unknown. The squeak of our sneakers on the hospital floor caused her to jerk her head up, her eyes filled with fear. A glimmer of hope crept in her eyes at the sight of the two of us. We were here in the hopes we could provide comfort and be a fortress she could seek refuge in, to help ease her many hurts, both physical and emotional.
I could tell Victoria wanted to embrace her friend but was mindful that it might cause her to become even more skittish under the circumstances. Victoria knelt on the floor in front of her friend and took her hand in hers, as I hovered behind her ready to do anything that was needed. Her voice was soft and comforting. “We’re here now and we’ll get through this together. Have you been seen by a doctor yet?” she questioned softly. Kandy snuffled back some tears, which had come to leak down her cheeks at our arrival. “Yes” she barely managed to get the word out. Victoria patiently waited while her friend collected herself enough to speak. She gently rubbed Kandy’s hand in hers, silently encouraging her to continue when she could. “The triage nurse took a look at me, I’ll be okay. I’m not a priority patient with my injuries but…Sush, Sush…oh my God, Vic, she’s not even conscious. They wouldn’t let me in the room with her because i wasn't a spouse or family! Like i just don't count for anything. Oh Vic this is my fault if we’d taken a cab home none of this would have happened but it was a nice night and we she suggested we walk,” she began to hiccup between words as they caught in her throat. “And I … and I thought it was a good idea.” Her voice faltered as she spoke. “It’s not your fault at all.” Victoria reassured her calmly. “You two didn’t do anything wrong and you have to believe that.”
The tears rolled freely now down Kandy’s face, and she sputtered as long gasps of air escaped her lungs. “You’re going to start hyperventilating, deep breaths. You’re okay, your safe now. Philip and I are here for you.” Victoria calmly but doggedly kept repeating phrases of positive reassurance to her friend, and it dawned on me she was doing as much for her own sake as for Kandy’s. I knelt beside her on the floor and placed my large hand gently over both hers and the one that she held. Kandy raised her head, ever so slightly as I did so. “We’re in this together. That’s what real friends do for each other.” I told her offering my own reassurances. The faintest look of hope sprouted on her face. “Thank you.” Was all she said but it somehow seemed to sum it up and I somehow knew the depths of her gratitude. “Look I don’t mean to be out of place here but have the police been contacted about this yet?” I prodded her as kindly as I could under the circumstances. I knew everything she’d been through had been traumatizing and that she was still in a great deal of physical pain as well, but it was better to report this to the authorities sooner rather than later. “Yes. It was a couple of passerby’s that saw what was happening and came to our aid. They phoned 911 so the police were there along with the ambulance. An officer took my statement and said he’d back to talk to me again and to check and see if Sush regained consciousness.” Which sent her into a fresh torrent of tears. I looked at Victoria questioningly, only to see her gallantly trying to fight back her own tears with a swipe of the back of her hand against her eyes.
“Randy, Randy Pearson” a female voice called. An ER nurse in scrubs stood holding a clipboard. “Over here.” I said as I rose to my full height. “Would you please follow me into exam room 7 please, sir?” she intoned. “Actually” I said, indicating the figure seated before me, “This would be Mr. Pearson. I’m just a close friend.” “Oh” she said, as her eyes darted to her chart and she flipped a couple of pages, as her eyes furtively scanned it. “Would it be all right if Miss Bellamy and I accompanied our friend, for moral support?” I asked. “Of course, it would as long as Mr. Pearson doesn’t have any objections to that.” She responded as she quickly recovered from her initial surprise. “No, I don’t.” Kandy responded listlessly. Victoria rose to her feet and the two of us gently helped Kandy up from her seat and escorted her on either side, forming a protective shield around Kandy as we began the slow walk to the exam room. She was stiff and moved slowly, almost mechanically with jerky movements. Victoria and I each had her by one arm in case she faltered in any way.
In the exam room we helped her on to the exam table and even with our help it was still a major exertion for her after all that she’d been through. The nurse began to go through the routine of following up on the questions the admitting triage nurse had asked her earlier, as well as applying a blood pressure cuff and monitoring a few other things and making notations on her patients chart. When she was through she flipped the chart closed and informed us that the Doctor would be in shortly after reviewing the chart. Before she could depart we made an inquiry about Sush and if there had been any changes in her condition. “I’m sorry” she responded. “I don’t know, but I’ll find out for you and get back to you as soon as possible.” We thanked her and she departed silently other than the slight squeak of the soles of her shoes as turned to exit.
“God how I hate, hospitals.” I thought to myself. It wasn’t so much the place itself that I hated but rather what it had come to represent to me. Cold, sterile, filled with a brooding ominous air and I’d come to loathe it. I’d spent too many nights over the years, all too similar to this one, and it killed a part of me each time I was caught up in it. It gnawed at me with its sharp little fangs, trying to inject it’s venom into me and poison my faith in humanity. Still I clung to that faith that there was still good in this world of ours, a world where there was still decency and kindness. There was a shining example of that decency and compassion that I still believed in, present in this room in the form of Philip. Here stood a man who less than a month ago, would never have found himself in this position and now he was hovering, as if he were a guardian angel, willing to do anything he could to offer comfort and support. In my eyes Philip, had shown such depth and strength of character and I couldn’t help but love him just a little more because of it.
There was also a silent undercurrent of rage, seething inside of me, about the senseless act of brutality that had been perpetrated on my friends. What had these people hoped to prove by doing this? I have to admit I was having some less than choice thoughts about what I’d like to do the cowardly creeps that had done this. Yes I wanted justice and no it wasn’t the eye for an eye kind that, was oh so tempting to consider. I was actually ashamed of myself for some of the vicious thoughts that were running through my mind because if I acted upon any of them I’d be no better than the pathetic people who had done this to my friends. Sush and Kandy and been minding their own business, they hadn’t done a single thing wrong. Yet were attacked just because they were different. Where did madness like this end? Where did people draw the line and decide to cross it and attack someone simply because they were being themselves? The more I thought about it the more it was doing my head in, and my head began to throb.“I can’t thank you two enough for being here. I was just so lost…” Kandy’s voice said breaking the silence of the room. “Think nothing of it.” Philip interjected. “Friends are there to support each other in good times and in bad.” “Totally.” I replied backing him up a hundred percent. Kandy sniffed back some tears of gratitude. “You two are the best. I hope you know that.” She said sincerely.
The doctor arrived at this juncture in the conversation. “Good evening. I’m Dr. Daniels.” He said introducing himself. He had a chart in his hands that he took another quick scan of, looking a bit befuddled at seeing a female patient on the exam table while he clearly had the charts for a male patient. “I’m a drag queen Doc.” Kandy supplied trying to avoid any further awkwardness. “Well then clearly I do have the correct charts. Now would you prefer that I refer to you as Randy or as something else? Randy or Kandy is fine, but I appreciate you asking.” Kandy clarified. “Right then, let me give you a good going over to see what we’re dealing with here. Would you like your friends to stay or step out into the hall while I do this?” The doctor asked and I was thankful that we’d gotten one with such a compassionate bedside manner. “I’m good either way.” She responded. “Victoria why don’t you stay and I’ll go see if I can track down that nurse or check at the front desk and see if I can find out about Sush?” Philip enquired kindly. It was as if he could read my mind. He knew I was torn between the desire not to abandon Kandy when she was still so unsettled and the desire to try and get details about how Sush was currently fairing. “Thank you.” Was all I said as he took my hand gave it a squeeze and said. “I’ll be back as soon as I can, hopefully with some good news.” And with that he hurried out of the room.
Dr. Daniels was thorough and kind in his examination being as gentle and respectful as was humanly possible. Thankfully there were no broken bones, but there were a couple of bruised ribs, that were sure to be tender for some time to come. He had cleaned and dressed her wounds with the help of a nurse who had returned to assist him. Fortunately no stitches were required. The bruises were deepening in colour and she still looked rough to say the least, but some of the colour had started to flood back into her face and I took that as a good sign. “Fortunately there doesn’t seem to be any signs of a concussion. I can release you tonight, provided you have someone to stay with you and keep an eye on you for any complications. If not I’ll admit you.” “She’ll be coming home with me Dr. Daniels. Just let me know what to keep an eye out for.” I responded quickly before Kandy could protest. “I’ll give you a follow up care list and if you notice anything on this list, please don’t hesitate to come back immediately. I’m also writing out a script for some painkillers which will have the added benefit of helping her relax and get some much needed rest.
There’s a pharmacy over on at Yonge and …” he began. “Carlton that’s open 24 hours where I can get it filled tonight. Sorry, but I’ve been down this road before.” I informed him. “Well I can see you’ll be in capable hands. I understand you have another friend that’s here as well, so please take your time and feel free to wait in here if you wish while you find out what’s going on with her. Kandy, I’ll send a nurse in with a first dose of meds for you to help you relax and relieve some of your pain. Lie down and rest if you can. Take your time, there’s no need to rush and I’m sure you want to be find out what’s going on with your other friend.” He said kindly. “Oh and I hope this isn’t out of line or inappropriate for me to say, but I’m relatively new here at St. Michael’s. I transferred here from a small hospital up in northern Quebec and this has been my first experience with a patient…such as yourself.” He added fumbling on the words “I’d just like to say that it’s been a privilege to have been of service to you. You’re obviously good people, despite sharing a life style that’s rather foreign to me.” He concluded. “Thank you Dr. Daniels.” Both Kandy and I said and truly meant it.
We were both thankful that we’d had been blessed with a compassionate, understanding doctor who took the rather unusual circumstances of his patient all into stride. He’d treated Kandy with dignity which was so important after the ordeal she had just experienced. I helped her lie down on the exam table and tried to make her as comfortable as I could. Kandy shivered despite the blankets that I covered her with and tucked in around her. This larger than life person, now seemed so tiny and fragile to me. As I gently stroked a few strands of hair off of her face, I could see the tension still so evident in her features. Placing my hand on her shoulder softly I hoped it would offer her some form of security. Knowing she was probably too fearful to shut her eyes, even for a few moments for fear the terrifying images of what had happened would flood her mind becoming an instant replay of the horrors she’d faced in the form of a nightmare. We spoke little, she remained in a prone positon only rallying to lift her head long enough to swallow the pain pills that a nurse brought in for her. The water that she’d the swallowed the medication with ran in a little stream over her swollen lip, and I gently dabbed it dry with a tissue. Like a mother hovering over the bed of sick child, waiting for any sign of improvement. Finally her eyes closed and she drifted off into sleep.
Ensuring she was in fact asleep I tippy toed across the room and into the brightly lit hallway, to see if there was any sign of Philip and if he’d been able to find out any information about Sush. Keeping my ears alert for any sign of distress from Kandy, my eyes searched the corridor. The hallway was packed as it tended to be on a Saturday night in a city hospital. People pushed rapidly down corridors on their way to be x rayed or have emergency surgeries performed. A sea of anxious faces of varying ages, mothers clutching children who howled into their shoulders. Doctors, nurses and orderlies rushing here and there talking rapidly as they went. I stood in the shadows of the doorway taking it all in.It was with great relief that I finally saw Philip push through a set of swinging doors and make his way down the hallway towards me. “We’re you able to find anything out? Did they let you see her?” I rattled off a rapid succession of questions at him. I’m sure I sounded beyond frantic to him and I wasn’t even sure about half the questions I was asking and logically knew he couldn’t answer as fast as I was firing them off at him. Bless him though he was remarkably taking it all into stride as he took my hands in his.
“Yes, I’ve got some information for you and yes I was able to see her for a few minutes I had to fudge a little though, its relatives only so I told them I was Sush’s brother.” He told me. My entire body was on pins and needles and I felt the urge to scream at the top of my lungs, waiting for him to tell me what he’d found out. Then it hit me. “Her brother??????” I questioned totally befuddled. “Well it’s supposed to be family only, so it was the first thing I could of. When the nurse in charge gave me a skeptical look. “ I just told her, you’ve never heard of adoption? So whether she actually bought it or she was just being incredibly compassionate under the circumstances, I got the information and was able to see her.” He concluded. “The good news is she’s conscious, the bad news is she’s even more banged up than Kandy was. She’s pretty bruised and sore and there was some internal bleeding as well. She needed several stitches and she’s going to have to remain in the hospital for several days so they can keep a close eye on her and monitor. They’re also going to run several more tests to make sure that nothing has been overlooked. Looks like she’s going to be fine Victoria.” He added with relief evident in his voice. Bursting into tears I began to collapse into his arms then I started to laugh hysterically in between the sobs, as it finally struck me. Philip had truly embraced my friends to the point he too would go to any lengths for them. I was an emotional mess but Philip just held me, loving me and supporting me through all of it.
Grabbing her before she could sink to the floor I held her close to my chest. The tears I’d been expecting from her arrived in a torrent. Holding her pressed against my chest I just let her sob, I knew she needed the release it would provide. I just held her close and stroked her hair comforting her silently. The truth of the matter was that I was just as overwhelmed by all of this as she was and felt a little weak kneed myself. When her tears finally subsided and her sobs were nothing more than soft little hiccups of air, I lifted her face to mine. “Would you like to go see her and reassure yourself that she’s going to be okay?” I asked her softly. “Yes” she said softly but almost inaudibly “but I can’t leave…” she began. “Kandy alone in case she wakes up and becomes disorientated or fearful.” “It’ll be okay. I’ll stay with her and you go give yourself some peace of mind. It’s late and they won’t let you stay long as they want to get her settled for the night and get some rest. In fact she may already be asleep but even sneaking a peak at her is what you need most right now. Go on I’ll give you the directions to the room she’s in.” Giving her the directions to Sush’s room I gave her a light kiss on the forehead and a final hug before she left on her mission.
All of this had been exhausting and I was more than a little wiped out myself. I pulled on of the two plastic chairs that were against the one wall of the room and dragged it over to where Kandy lay resting. Settling in and stretching out as best I could I closed my own eyes as I gathered my own thoughts about everything that had happened in such a rapid fire sequence of events this evening. The grand opening of my latest business venture has gone off better than I could have ever imagined. I’d felt like the golden boy that could do no wrong after I’d been handed that plum offer to present my works in an exhibition at the Art Gallery of Ontario. Victoria had been in her element and shone brightly with her performances. Then a short but wonderful time spent with friends celebrating all the success we’d both just had. Finally taking my best girl home, looking forward to relaxing with her and falling asleep with her in my arms after a strenuous period of preparations on both out parts to make everything come off like the well-oiled machine functioning at peak capacity, just as it had.
But a ringing phone in the wee hours of the morning had changed all of that wonderful positive energy we had going on. That phone call had brought with it fear, uncertainly, anger, pain and a level of anxiety that I’d never experienced anything quite like before and hoped and prayed I’d never have to experience again. Knowing that Victoria had experienced all of this on other occasions sickened me no end and I felt the lump of unease in the pit of my stomach. It grieved me no end that I hadn’t been here to help her and comfort her during those times. My protective instincts towards her were finely honed despite the fact we had only been a couple a short while. It didn’t matter to me she was a part of me and I felt in the core of my being that she had always been a part of me. Even before I had known of her existence. Kandy stirred and a groan emitted from her. “Where am I? What happened?” she mumbled. Pushing the chair I stood up and took her hand. “Kandy it’s okay. You’re safe.” I assured her.
As her eyes opened, it took her a minute to collect her thoughts as her as she was still groggy from the medication they’d given her. “Philip? Where’s Victoria? How’s Sush?” she questioned as she tried to sit up. “No please don’t just relax as much as much as you can.” And she settled down again. Her eyes closed again as if the light in the room though dimmed was painful to her. “First of all how are you feeling now?” I asked her quietly. “Like I got run over by a transport truck.” She said wryly. “I’m tough I can take it. Now please tell me about the others.” She begged me. “While you were sleeping I was able to actually see Sush, she’s conscious now, she’s pretty sore and they’re going to keep her for observation for a few days but the doctors assure me that she’ll make a full recovery.” I told her wanting to be truthful with her but at the same time not causing her further stress with a blow by blow account of the extent of Sush’s injuries. “Thank God, for that.” She said empathically. It was at this conjuncture in the conversation that Victoria appeared in the room. She came over and stood on the other side of Kandy and took her other hand. With a single look to me she communicated so much.